Today is my last Sunday living alone – hopefully for a very long time.
For the past six years I’ve lived by myself in Montreal. This week, I’m finally moving in with Xavier.
It’s a big chapter of my life coming to an end, and as much as I’m happy I had the opportunity to live my young adult life on my own, I am even more happy it’s over.
Living by myself was positive for so many reasons.
I gained maturity a lot faster having to figure things out on my own and being by myself often (thus facing my thoughts), and this helped me to discover my personality, what I like and dislike, what annoys me, what makes me happy, the kind of life I want to live.
Living alone gave me confidence and pushed me to question myself and to face life in a way I could have avoided if I had stayed in the comfort of my parents’ home. For instance, when I lived with my parents as a teenager, I always thought I would like to go into the communication and marketing field. I didn’t want to go into too much of a “hard” program because I didn’t think I could handle it, and I thought communication would be appropriate since I liked talking. However, living by myself not only showed me that life is expensive and that if I wanted to live the kind of life I was aiming for, I’d better roll up my sleeves and get serious about school and jobs, but it also gave me a newfound confidence that proved to be crucial. Having to figure out everything on my own, I proved to myself that I’m strong and I can handle anything. It’s that confidence that pushed me to aim high, switch schools and programs, get out of a bad relationship and go get the job I wanted. One should never underestimate confidence.
Of course, living alone gave me so much freedom. I could do anything I wanted, every day. Go out to a cool new restaurant? Sure, any day. Go out to a bar with friends? Yes, any day. Eat a whole pizza by myself? No worries, any time. Go out on a date on a week night? No problem! That’s the part I loved the most about those years. The independence. I’ve always been a responsible person, so it was easy for me to balance the fun with the school and the work. It was so much fun to live it all, on my own, with no authority.
That said, living alone was not always easy.
There are many times where I wish someone would have been there to listen to me, to comfort me, to have a great conversation with and to share laughs. I ate almost every dinner alone with Netflix for the past 6 years. I had a lot of alone time, and it was difficult at times. I had to go through a sickness on my own. I had to take care of myself each day, because no one else would do it for me. If I could point to one thing that didn’t make me so happy, it was this. Relationships and human contacts are so important, and I sometimes felt I was lacking that.
That’s why I’m so happy to move in with Xavier. He’ll finally be that person I can make jokes with, have dinner with, or have impromptu dance parties with. He’ll be the shoulder I can cry on and the person I can surprise with a cool new recipe. I won’t be alone anymore, I’ll take care of someone, and someone will be taking care of me. That feels amazing.
I can’t wait to start this new chapter of my life.
Bring it on, adult life!